


If I Were A Boy

by bubblewhale2



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bullying, Faint Sexual Tension, Gay Remus Lupin, Gen, He Braves It, Implied Relationships, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Marauders, Marauders Friendship, Marauders' Era, Quidditch, Remus Will Not Back Down From A Challenge, Sirius Black & James Potter Friendship, Slice of Life, Stream of Consciousness, This Was A Bitch To Translate, remus has social anxiety, short and sweet, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2019-05-26 15:44:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15004094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bubblewhale2/pseuds/bubblewhale2
Summary: Remus and Peter go to a Hogwarts version of gym class. Remus hates it. Sirius pulls a prank on him on the way back to the locker room. It's not at all that saucy as this vague summary might make you think. It's just a short slice-of-life kinda thing.





	If I Were A Boy

If I Were A Boy 

 

 

Lupin sighed, moping.

He hated Tuesdays. He hated them even more than he hated Mondays.

The reason for it was the late-morning exercise. It was run by vital but mean Madame  _Bootch_ , and it usually consisted of flying.

Remus used to fly on a crooked Cleansweep that had a mean tendency to pull left. This did not, in his opinion, help his complete lack of coordination while mid-air on a broom. At all.

The only person in class that had it worse than him was Peter. James and Sirius, both excellent flyers and members of Gryffindor’s Quiddich team, were excused from the regular flying classes so they could focus more on training with the team.

Remus did not know if that fact made his pains more severe or less. The lack of his friends' unquestionable support did make the already hated class worse, but on the other hand, at least he did not have to embarrass himself in front of them, too.

 _Still, how much more embarrassed can you be in front of people who see you buck naked, every month, at down, after a night of a full moon, sometimes even before your tail completely disappears?_ Remus sourly thought to himself, taking his Cleansweep out of his locker in the changing room.

To make everything even worse, all students had to wear jerseys that were consisted of shorts and shirts in the colors of their houses… but his was so washed out that it seemed closer to pink, rather than scarlet.

He made a mental note to study a fabric color rejuvenating charm.

Still, if caught in this peculiar task of mending clothes, he could fuel more jokes with the same punchline that wearing pink got him.

 _Although_ , he cut off that train of thoughts:  _that whole ordeal had nothing to do with his clothes, really._

„It looks like we're outside again, people! Puffs are training in the stadium right now. “ Some boy’s voice echoed around the locker room.

 _Whatever._  Remus sighed again to himself and took after a group of boys, following them to the well-known and well loathed yard.

Their destination was somewhat farther off from the castle than the main Quiddich pit. Madame Hooch was already there, awaiting them. She made them do a fifteen minute warm-up and then gave out worn out Quaffles, ordering a half-hour of Quiddich with improvised enchanted sticks instead of goal posts.

Remus did not do much except watching the jock types that didn’t make the main teams let out their frustrations on the ball. It was safer to move out of the way anyways. He tried to attract as little attention was possible, but still managed to get one or two homophobic slurs thrown at him by a big, dumb Slytherin student.

_Who the fuck decided that Gryffs and Slyths having joint classes was a good idea, ever?_

Still, he could fend for himself.

His team lost an unmemorable match to equally lousy team. After that they all landed, tired and sweaty, they started a slow march back towards the changing rooms situated at the main pitch.

A grassy patch that was used as their training ground was at a perfect position to be visible from most of the rest of Hogwarts Park. An especially good view was to be had by whomever made his way from the castle towards the main entrance to the Quiddich pitch.

Remus walked with his broom awkwardly situated under his arm, alongside crestfallen Wormtail that trotted sadly next to him.

He noticed a giggling group of girls in the distance in front of them, which was slowly getting closer to the gates of the pitch. With an unpleasant twang in his stomach he spotted the trio they were all obviously following; James, Sirius and another Gryffindor chaser. All three of them carried their own broomsticks casually thrown over one shoulder, with an ease that only talented flyers possess.

They managed, noticed Remus, to look much more graceful than himself.

_Easy with the self-loathing now, eh? You know what Sirius would tell you; you're not gaining anything but wrinkles by frowning, Moony._

“Look, Moony! Padfoot and Prongs are going to the pitch, too. I had no idea that they had training today.” Peter shot out, raising his chubby arm to wave at his friends across the grassy field sideways from the main pitch.

A group of tired students followed closely after Peter and Remus, slowly progressing towards the back doors of the stadium that led to the locker rooms directly under the stands.

“Yeah, Sirius said that the Puffs are planning to reschedule half of their training time for Thursdays, so our team jumped in.” said Remus, while he watching James pause and raise his free arm and do a waving motion.

A group of girls behind the three Quiddich players got closer, and the rest of the class got closer to Remus and Peter, too. Remus noticed that most of his colleagues have spotted and recognized Potter and Black from afar, pausing before making a turn towards the side entrance to the pitch. Their attention seemed to be mildly perked at the sight of famous boys. He himself has also halted, watching as Sirius turned his head to James, whispering something in his ear. James straightened his back and then laughed, obviously at some joke Sirius had said.

Lupin squinted his eyes in suspicion, blinking in the morning sun, awaiting for Sirius to greet them, too. He had an odd premonition of sorts, feeling as if everyone in the yard turned expectantly to watch Sirus.

He saw Sirus take his broom off the shoulder and throw it carelessly on the grass. He turned away from James towards Peter and himself, proceeding to throw back his head to shake his black hair out of his face, and then took a long step forwards.

Lupin thought that for a moment, even from this distance, he caught a glimpse of mischief in grey eyes.

After taking a short run-up that ended up looking more like a jump, Sirius formed a trumpet like shape with his palms and put them around his mouth.

For a part of a second, Lupin closed his eyes in anguish – _he wouldn't, not in front of this much people_ , than opened his eyes again.

Twisting his back in a way that Lupin recognized as eerily familiar, and with a swelling of breast under his cloak, Sirius took a deep breath and then let out a long, loud and piercing wolf-like _howl_ , which inevitably rang out through the park.

For a moment, Lupin was frozen with disbelief.

Some Slytherin accusing him of being queer is _nothing_ compared to risk of his biggest secret being revealed.

Chit-chat that had been filling out the air suddenly stopped, and everybody stared at the two Quiddich players sharing the same grin stretched out across their mouths. Their posing was mockingly ignorant off all the spectators but two.

Sirius finished his greeting and casually stepped back, keeping his eyes on Remus.

“Remus…” Peter fumbled about with a hint of panic in his voice, throwing an anxious look towards Lupin's rigid face.

There was almost audible shifting as all eyes turned from Sirius to him and Peter.

_Fuck. What do I do now?_

He tried to ignore the cursed audience to the best of his abilities.

 _I have to fake it,_ Remus decided, and reflexively laughed inappropriately loudly. Then he looked at Wormtails panicked face and let out somewhat more honest chuckle.

_Oh fuck it all._

He gave him his Cleansweep saying: “Hold my broom, Wormtails.”

Without raising his hands around his mouth (as he found it to be _just a bit too theatrical_ ) Lupin bravely stepped up.

He stretched out his scrawny neck and shoulders as much as he could, and without missing a beat, returned the greeting right back at Sirius.

By howling loudly.

The howl was perfectly dramatized, a matching pair to his friend’s greeting.

Continuing to mirror Sirius, Lupin stepped back after it was done and took his broom back from Wormtails.

A beat.

Then, Sirus howlers with his famous roar: a barking-like laughter.

The booming sound seems to disperse all of the tension from the air immediately. The audience looks away and the normal chatting continues as on cue.

Wormtails just looks at Lupin with his eyes slightly bulging from awe and freshly forming giggles.

Four friends continue walking in their designated directions, a little more spring to their steps.

 

* * *

 

“He's gonna kill you for that later. You are aware of that?”

Sirius picks up his broom and continues to walk side by side next to his friend who's raising an eyebrow at him.

“It was totally worth it.” Sirius answers, still smirking. „You know,“ he continues a bit quieter, so only James can hear him,

„how often can you see a werewolf howling in public and nobody _bats an eye?_ “

Sirius smiles at James pulling his best how-much-do-you-love-me face on.

„You rascal“ accuses James, betrayed only by the shameless grin dancing over his lips as they were entering the stadium with a group of tittering girls hot on their tracks.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I had to translate this from my mother tongue. Hope it finds its way to some readers, bc I'd really like some feedback, since HP fandom was my first fandom ever :)
> 
> The title is just the song that was playing in my mind when I first got the picture of boys greeting each other from afar as they do in the fic. Nothing to it.
> 
> I wanted this piece to have a sort of a light, golden, sunny, misty air about it. With a quality of a frame of a happy, carefree moment frozen in time. 
> 
> About the Madam "Butch" thing, I just felt like Remus hated PE so much he would hate on the teacher too, and he obvs has some internalized homophobia issues.
> 
> Reading my own summary for this made me think of boys actually getting it on in the locker room. Maybe Remus going to congratulate -ahm- Sirius after a won Quidditch match, finding him fresh out of the shower, or something cheesy like that. Sorry about the click bait summary, is all.


End file.
